I Review Movies: Ralph Breaks the Internet

So! Today, my mom came and watched the twins and gave me money to take Sam to see Ralph Breaks the Internet, which was awesome enough that I wrote a review of it! And talked about how it plays into my parenting a little, but mostly, this is all review.

46836801_10155859274325592_2932259492504535040_o(at the movies; ignore the grotesque stress breakout on my chin)

For those of us who came of age with the internet, a physical manifestation of the internet would aesthetically resemble nothing so much as Panem from The Hunger Games–a dangerous wasteland of scum and villainy punctuated by a handful of shining clean and innocent beacons that grow fewer in number by the day (not that the cleaner and shinier parts of Panem were actually innocent; I mean this more from an aesthetic point of view). In that, the idea of Ralph Breaks the Internet, Disney’s sequel to the 2012 film Wreck It Ralph, scared me more than a little. The idea of Disney turning the internet into a living, breathing, physical world ran the risk of being far too sanitized to speak any real truth while simultaneously being oversaturated with product placements so numerous as to make even the staunchest capitalist reach for a barf bag.

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Thankfully, Ralph Breaks the Internet manages to steer clear of both risks, instead turning out a film that surprised me with its intelligence, insight, and humor.

(spoilers ahead; spoiler free review: this film was so much fun and so thoughtful that it genuinely surprised me, and I really liked the first movie!)

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The film picks up six years after the first, and life is pretty good for Ralph: he spends his days “working” (i.e., being the villain in the Fix-It Felix, Jr. arcade game) and his nights hanging out with Vanellope in various other games–Tapper, Tron, some variant on a Madden title. Vanellope isn’t so happy with this arrangement, however, as her joy over being a legitimate racer has dimmed now that Sugar Rush has run out of surprises for her, with all of the secret tracks unlocked and every race she’s in coming out with her on top.

Ralph doesn’t understand her apathy, which introduces the film’s primary conflict: in deriving all of his happiness and self-worth from Vanellope, Ralph takes any unhappiness on her part as a swipe against him. It isn’t, of course; Vanellope has other avenues of happiness besides her best friend, and she’s understandably distraught when her home–the game Sugar Rush–is unplugged because of a broken part. Ralph once again takes this as a personal attack because, to him, as long as he has Vanellope, he’s happy. She is his one source of happiness, and it’s exactly as toxic as it sounds.

It’s not something that a lot of kids’ films and especially a lot of Disney films delve into with a great deal of frequency, since it’s not only a nuanced plot but one that goes against the general trends of storytelling when there’s a main male and main female character. It’s obviously not the case in every movie, but a relationship in which both partners’ life problems are magically fixed because of one special person in their lives is rarely one that’s given close examination in film media. In real life, that sort of relationship would be toxic as hell and drowning in red flags; but in films, it’s accepted as yes, of course, this is the way things are supposed to be.

And when you think about it critically, you find yourself asking, what message is that sending to people in general?

Another interesting thing about this is that Ralph is trying so hard to be the only one that Vanellope needs to be happy. When she expresses boredom with her game, he goes to the trouble of creating a new track for her to race on, which inadvertently causes the game’s steering wheel to break. When she’s too miserable about losing her game to hang out with him, he decides that they’re going to the internet themselves to find the replacement part for her game so that she won’t be homeless any longer. Even his more villainous actions–manipulating Vanellope away from the game that made her truly happy (a sanitized version of Grand Theft Auto called Slaughter Race) and eventually releasing a virus into that game to make it too boring for her to want to stay there–have a mask of concern on them: he fears for her safety outside of her game, as characters that die outside of their games don’t regenerate.

But ultimately, it’s Ralph’s insecurities that serve as the greatest villain in the film, a decision for which I applaud the writers of the film. A handful of recent Disney films (okay, okay, it’s mostly Frozen I’m talking about here) have villains shoehorned in when they aren’t really necessary, largely because that provides a safer route for the studio: a man vs. man conflict is much easier to translate to the screen for younger viewers than a man vs. self conflict. Here, though, Disney takes the risk and makes the story about a man figuring himself out: Ralph has to literally deal with his crushing insecurities in order to save both his and Vanellope’s lives.

(I do mean literally)

And GOSH, but I appreciate that in a film that’s marketed as being more for boys (because, let’s be real here, Disney very much sticks to a boy-girl dichotomy in their marketing, but that’s another discussion for another time). As a stereotypical “boy” film, it was incredibly thoughtful and nuanced–nobody solves any problems by fighting or punching, but with mindfulness, compassion, introspection, and communication. The most objectively badass characters in the film are all women (for those who keep track of such things, this film more than passes the Bechdel Test, with heavy-hitters like Gal Gadot and Taraji P. Henson providing the talent behind the newest characters), but their badassery doesn’t necessarily come from them being given traditionally masculine traits. Instead, Gal Gadot’s street racer Shank, while also falling into stereotypical “badass racer” tropes, acts as an almost mother figure for her gang of racers and, eventually, for Vanellope herself. Taraji P. Henson’s Yesss, an algorithm, is tough and outspoken, but at the same time excited, sociable, and wise.

This may seem like reading a lot into a cartoon film, but I’ve found that since I have kids, I read a lot more into what films are saying than I used to. As much as I’m able to influence my kids’ feelings and mindsets, I know that they’ve got TONS of other influencers that I can’t control, and a lot of those influencers are in media. And while I’m perfectly happy for my kids to see heroic and stereotypically masculine heroes and plots (Star Wars, I’m looking at you–or at least at the original trilogy), having a film to balance that out, where the male lead solves his problems not by punching or fighting them but by working through his feelings–that’s pretty sweet.

So overall, I really liked the film and its primary message: that you shouldn’t derive all your happiness and self-worth from one person, that it’s okay if best friends have separate lives because if your friendship is strong, it can withstand distance and difference. And I liked a lot of the details, too.

Like the depiction of the internet. Again, when I heard that this film was going to involve Disney characters going to the internet, my first response was “oh no.” The internet is like a Mad Max film with a few suburban oases scattered about. Aside from a few specific hideouts, it’s a PvP enabled zone, and I couldn’t conceive of it being depicted in any way that was sanitized enough for Disney standards.

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(shown: what the internet is really like)

It seemed to me that Disney understood this as well, because the film is littered with hints of the darker side of the internet that will fly over most kids’ heads but will have adults chuckling knowingly. At one point, a pop-up ad (here behaving much like street vendors outside popular tourist destinations) tells Ralph that “Sassy housewives want to meet you!” Once Ralph and Vanellope enter eBay (the location of the missing part for Vanellope’s game), Vanellope spots a section of “baby clothes” marked lingerie (which she adorably mispronounces). And, of course, Ralph’s insecure quest to control Vanellope eventually leads him to the Dark Web, of which we thankfully don’t see much.

(for those unversed in internet lingo, the Dark Web is the lawless underbelly of the internet; in the film, it’s mostly portrayed as a place to buy viruses and stolen credit cards, while the real Dark Web is home to infinitely more sinister pursuits)

The film is also littered with internet and pop culture references, somewhat like the film Ready Player One, which came out earlier this year. That said, however, the cultural references here come about mostly organically and serve to further the plot, rather than to show the viewer how many references the filmmakers know. The only sequence where the references get a little heavy-handed is the Oh My Disney! sequence, which isn’t terribly surprising: these are Disney’s IPs, and they’re going to use them, damnit.

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But even that sequence actually served a purpose, instead of just existing to be like “whee, we’re Disney, and we own Star Wars and Marvel and, if you’re a parent, most of your money!” The first princess scene (there are two, and they’re both honestly delightful) serves to help Vanellope realize that she’s been denying her own dreams because she’s afraid of upsetting Ralph (and to realize it in a bizarrely clever way that made me think, “gosh, I hope Vanellope gets official Disney Princess status”). And, of course, Sam loved seeing the references to Star Wars and other Disney films he enjoys.

My only disappointment with the film (I can’t call it a criticism because I don’t think there’s really a way to fix it without the film suffering) was that we didn’t get to see more of Calhoun and Felix, the side characters from the first film. They show up, but I think they have about half a dozen lines between them. Their plot (in which they take in the orphaned racers from Sugar Rush and serve as their adoptive parents) sounds like it would’ve made a hilarious side story, but it would absolutely have taken away from Ralph and Vanellope’s story, which is excellent. I’d love it, though, if maybe on the BluRay release, we had a short featuring Calhoun and Felix figuring out how to parent these miscreants, because we learn by the end that they exceeded everyone’s wildest expectations for doing so.

Other bulleted thoughts:

  • One of the most delightful things about both this film and Wreck It Ralph is the animation of the video game characters and how that animation flows with the character’s game. Characters from older games move in a choppier fashion, while characters from newer games have much smoother animation. In this film, the trend continues into new avenues: people’s internet avatars move choppier or smoother, depending on their connection to the internet; in Slaughter Race, the played characters position themselves, jump, and move in a way that’s all too familiar to anyone who’s played any sort of MMO.

  • Okay, maybe I did cry a little at two points. First, I teared up when Ralph breaks the number one rule of the internet and reads the comments. The comments on his viral videos (which he created to raise money to pay for the steering wheel for Vanellope’s game, after he and Vanellope naively jacked the price up to more than $20,000) jab at all the insecurities he thought he’d lost because of his friendship with Vanellope and leave him more vulnerable to impulsive bad ideas, even after he’s succeeded at his stated goal. And second, I teared up at the end, when Vanellope–whose code has been integrated into Slaughter Race–says good-bye to Ralph before he heads back to the arcade. Both characters know that they’re going to find real happiness where they are, but the separation still hurts, and it reminded me more than a little of the velcro tear feeling of a long-distance relationship. Ouch, Disney. Ouch.

  • The Pancake/Milkshake scene didn’t make it into the final cut of the film, but it’s worth sticking around through the credits, because it does show up there, and in an adorably winking way that I really appreciated.

  • I honestly couldn’t stand Yesss’s name until it became clear that she was an algorithm… at which point, she made perfect sense, and I loved her.

  • Also Shank. There needs to be so much more Shank merchandise because she was an amazing character. And I am not just saying this because Gal Gadot is everything. Just seriously. I love all the cozy princess stuff and would absolutely spend money on it if I hadn’t had to replace like nine pieces of technology in the last two weeks, but Disney, if anyone there in marketing reads this, I promise that if you make more Shank merchandise, like maybe a Shank doll in the same tradition as the princess dolls and the Yesss doll, I will totally buy it.

In conclusion: a solid A, a rollicking good time, a delight, and a surprisingly thoughtful film.

On Writing and Turning 35

It’s November, which is something I’ve been waiting for most of the year. I love the end of the year, from October straight on through New Year’s (though October slightly less because it tends to be bad luck for me in general), and I’m feeling really good this year, at least on a personal level. Thanks to a generous gift from Kyle’s grandfather, we’re actually feeling comfortable financially, and we’re able to get started on celebrating Christmas and giving our kids a fantastic holiday season.

Facebook’s memories feature keeps reminding me that, for several years in the past, November meant the start of NaNoWriMo for me. Nano, for the uninitiated, is National Novel Writing Month. It’s this big… thing where people across the country and world sit down and try to bang out 50,000 words over the thirty days that make up November. It usually involves a lot of crying, swearing, and procrastination on some level.

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(shown: 6 hours of work)

For me, it typically involved (past tense for now, I’ll get to that in a minute) the early adoption of Christmas music, as somehow, the dulcet tones of holiday hits, both present and past, get my writing fingers going. The words flow, the stories build, and I get things done when there’s Christmas music playing. For some reason.

(sidebar: I discovered this during graduate school, when I’d procrastinated on my final paper and presentation until the night before. I poured myself a bowl of cereal, turned the TV on to the Music Choice Sounds of the Seasons channel, and banged out 15 pages of philosophy/rhetoric thoughts and a 10 minute presentation; and combined, the two earned a 95, and I got a 93 for the class. Moral of the story? As we used to say back when I studied at Oxford, procrastination is merely the realization that true genius is forged in the white hot flames of crisis)

So anyway, that used to be the case, but for obvious reasons, Nano has been a struggle since 2014. I started to try it that November, but Sam was six months old, we were in the process of buying a house, and my body was still adjusting to my antidepressants. The next year, I was working, as with the year after that and the year after that. This year, I’m not working, but I now have two eight-month-old babies and a four-year-old.

“So what?” says the reader, and I say, so I’m tired. I have ideas, but they mostly come to me as I’m drifting off to sleep late at night, and I’m far too tired to pull myself out of bed and get them on paper or else wake myself up properly enough to make a note about them (though I probably should do that). I’m tired, and I hate it. God, I miss writing, but by the time I get to the end of the day, even the best days, I’m ready to zonk out, floating with that feeling of running on E.

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I’ve always compared writing to oxygen for me, and though I’ve been reading plenty, I haven’t been creating as much, so it feels a bit like taking a deep breath and holding it for a while. Sooner or later, you need to exhale.

Which is what this blog is, I suppose: a small exhale for me. I have ideas I want to play with and develop, I have stories I want to keep telling and start telling; I just get to the end of the day and stare at the blank page and wish it would just fill itself without me needing to think about it. I used to be able to do that, honestly, but I think I’m just so drained by this particular phase of my life that it’s harder than it should be. Ugh.

But it’s a phase, and Sam will be in kindergarten next year, and it’s only four or so  years until the twins are in preschool 2-3 days a week, depending on what school we send them to. I have plans, and people say, “Don’t wait! Start today!” but seriously, I’m tired. I know what will happen the first morning all three of my children are at school: I will nap. The second morning, I will go and buy a dozen donuts only for me. The third morning, I will write.

(of course, the best laid plans and all that; I’ll probably spend the first morning sobbing, the second morning watching The Price is Right, and the third morning constructing an elaborate city in The Sims or something)

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Speaking of phases, though, I’m an hour and a half away from turning 35!

(how’s that for a segue? Yep, I’ve still got it)

Thirty-five. It’s a weird number. When it comes to fertility, it’s this dreaded number, where your fertility drops off and you start producing the weird eggs, the old and dusty bottom of your reserve. This isn’t really true, actually; your fertility drops off a little at 35, but it’s not this drastic thing. Still, though, once you hit 35, any fertility dances you do are done with an added caution sign.

Which– I used to be worried about it, but now I’ve got three kids, and any further kids I’d want to have would come from the embryos I froze last year, so I’m actually kind of okay with 35 from a fertility perspective.

Obviously not the only one that matters, but I’m happy. Life is honestly pretty good right now. The kids are fantastic. Kyle is incredible. I’ve got a comfortable home, a rockin minivan (two words I don’t usually expect to put together), great friends, and awesome family. If this is 35, I’m loving it.

A couple of months ago, I was at a family get-together, and my mom frowned and plucked a grey hair from my head. I no longer get carded, as Kyle and I discovered when we went out to eat the other day (and I was served possibly the worst cosmopolitan I’ve ever had, by the way). My joints snap, crackle, and pop when I try to function. I am well acquainted with back pain.

But I don’t really mind it. There’s this weird life stigma against aging, that it’s something to dread or feel sad about, but I don’t. Grey hair is easier to dye fun colors. No longer being carded means I don’t have to fish for my wallet every time I want a glass of moscato. I’m not a fan of all the aches and pains, but they’re manageable enough thus far.

Basically, aging has been pretty great thus far, and I’m looking forward to the future, to seeing where my life goes from here, to grabbing onto and living out new dreams.